Not a piece of furniture.

So I have a video for you. It's subtle. Lets see if you can figure out what's pissing me off:



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e4jVqYWJGwc

I know it seems like nothing, but I was trying to get by on the sidewalk and there was a table full of girls in the way. These girls were 16ish so not children.  I just sat there waiting for them to move their extra chair. None of them moved or looked at me. It was like I was invisible. Finally my aide moved the chair after it was obvious that they were not going to be of any use.  This annoyance is obviously not huge, but it happens many times a day. It gets old.

Now it seems like people either ignore me entirely or  get a little too close for comfort. There is rarely a "normal" encounter. By normal I mean just your standard "Oh, excuse me," or "Hi, how are you?" or even, "Would you like milk in your coffee?"  The funnier thing would be if people treated me like everyone else they might realise that I am indeed just like everyone else.

Get out of my way or I will pee on you...

Story time (since I have no new videos)! Let me preface this by saying that although there is some religion involved in the story, I am in no way suggesting that it was the religion that bothered me. Just the annoying people.

So I was at the Abilities Expo, which for those of you who don't know is an annual conference showcasing the latest technology for disabled people. There is everything from wheelchairs to beds to communication devices, and lots and lots of disabled people.  Its held in a conference hall where a few conferences can be held at once. I spent the morning cruising the exhibits, talking to the vendors, and enjoying the company of other people with disabilities. When noon rolled around I had to use the bathroom, so me and my aide took off to find them. There was a long line of women in purple robes gathering in front of the women's bathroom. I thought that was a bit odd but I knew other people were holding conferences of their own. I just thought this must have been some sort of  purple robe conference, so I took my place in line.  Then it started.

It quickly became apparent that all of these women were involved in a Jehovah's Witness conference and they all began talking to me, telling me how they can heal me, patting my head, and causing a general hubbub. I was used to this but I really had to pee and they were all crowded around me. Even when I went in the stall (which was not handicapped so I couldn't close the door all the way) they were still talking.

I guarantee if I wasn't visibly disabled, they wouldn't have been nearly as intereted in me.  And because I can't talk I couldn't tell them "If you don't move I will pee on you". My aide could have, but she didn't want to seem rude. It was even tricker because I knew they were coming from a place of good intention, so I didn't want to be snippy.  But let this be a lesson. Even if you mean well, you can still be annoying, especially when there is pee involved.

Hi, I'm a person too.

I have another video for you. Let me set the stage:

I needed to get more vitamins so I went to my local vitamin shop. When my aide and I arrived, we tried to find what we were looking for on our own, but when we couldn't, we waited at the register. The owner was helping another customer, which was fine. But he made eye-contact with my aide (just to acknowledge that he would be with her in a moment). But he didn't look at me or say anything to me. I mean NOTHING for a good 10 minutes. When he was done with the other person he approached my aide to help her (again, not me).  He then led my aide to the section that had what I needed. My aide was clear to say "SHE is looking for..." and "can you help US find..." but no response from him. When I paid...



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zZkLXvbReL4

As you can see, the only acknowledgement I got was a Big Special Wave right as I turned to leave.  Like I said in my previous post...for god sake, treat adults like adults.

Hopefully my next video will show a different aspect of people being insensitive. These are the kinds of things I get most commonly (seriously like everyday), and I know seeing the same thing over and over will get old.  But I'm taping everyday and if I get nothing, then I will just tell you another story about one of my past encounters.

Just trying to get my tea...

Ok folks, it's video time.  Just to initially explain some stuff, the faces are blurred just to protect the privacy of the people who appear. Since acting strangely is not specific to one person, I didn't want to be like  "Ha ha! Look at this person being an idiot!" because we have all probably done stupid things we would hate to see on camera. I have also added annotations for the hearing impaired  and to tell you what I am thinking during these interactions. Don't worry, you'll be able to tell my internal dialogue from when the other people are talking

Soooo. I was just getting my green tea lemonade from Starbucks when I had an encounter with the barista. Some of the writing might appear small, so if you're having trouble reading it, click on the video and it will take you to youtube where you can full screen it. Watch:



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gv-u2nUNhB4

Now let me explain. Many  MANY people think that I am a 10-year-old boy when they meet me. For the record, I am a 26-year-old female, but I am of small stature and I have a short hair cut. People almost always think my aides are my mom or dad besides the fact that some of them are actually younger than me.  Now our lovely barista asked me in a very condescending tone how I was then proceeded to tell me that I have a nice smile (for a boy). Now asking people how they are doing is great! But if you don't know the person your default tone should be how you would talk to an adult. Even if a person can't speak, looks like their 10, or seems cognitively disabled, its always best to go with the default tone.  You can also take cues from the people with them (if they have anyone with them). For example, if they are with someone who is having a normal conversation with them, then there you go. I know the barista had the best intentions, but let this be a lesson to all you able-bodied folks. Talk to adults as adults!

The Soap Lady

Hey everyone, so I decided that when I don't have a video to post, I will tell you about some of the past experience that I have had. This one is called "The Soap Lady"

One day I was sitting outside a local cafe having coffee and just chilling out with my dad, and I see a homeless person walking up the street, which is normal and so I didn't think anything of it. She was fairly put together but had a lot of make-up on. I mean a LOT. Anyway, when she got to our table she asked for change to buy a soda. My dad gave her a dollar and she was on her way. She didn't really talk to me or look at me during the exchange, which was fine with me. About 15 minutes passes and I kind of forget about her. That is, untill she comes back straight to our table. She places a new pack of Ivory soap right in front of me and mumbles somthing.  I'm guessing she said "this is for you," but I'm not really sure. Then she walked away.

Now obviously the soap lady had some issues that may have contributed to her acting in such a way. But the theme of 'people needing to give stuff to me'  is not new. I think people see a "poor disabled person" and want to reach out, but they do so in an extremely misguided manner. Nobody give other able-bodied people random things. To date, I have been offered a bar of soap, money (many times, including from a homeless person), Michael Jackson T-shirts, bread, and many other things.

Anyway, hope you enjoyed this story. And hopefully my next post will include some videos.

Hi and welcome to The Deal with Disability!

Hey, I'm Eva. I'm a recent college graduate. I like to write, to take digital photographs, and just chill. But this blog is not about what I like. This blog is about how people treat me. You see, I am physically disabled. Actually "severely" physically disabled. I have Cerebral Palsy, which for me means I can't walk, speak, or use muscles in traditional ways. I use a power wheelchair to get around and spell out what I want to say on a letterboard.

This blog will be videos and stories of people treating me bizarrely. My video camera is mounted to my wheelchair (very discreetly) and I basically just press record whenever I go out and then edit the good stuff for you! I will then write my comments on the event, which is usually what was playing in my inner monologue while these insensitive people were talking. Feel free to email me at eva.g.sweeney@gmail.com. Hope you enjoy. Here's an introduction video (no other people, sorry).



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=POJ8IQFCv6s

P.S. I want to make this blog accessible for everyone so please send me any suggestions you have to help accommodate your needs or the needs of others.